THE CRASH.
I built this bike in early 2023, to replace my Omnium CXC. A Salsa Warbird, which is supposed to be a gravel bike, but I also used it as a road bike with a different wheelset. (Find more pictures of it here).
I covered about 8000km with it in the few months I had it, mostly during bikepacking trips. I considered it near perfect, I thought that I would keep it for the rest of my life. Which was nearly the case, but not quite like I imagined.
BOOM.
In early October 2023, as I was returning home from a weekly group ride around Paris, in the blink of an eye, BOOM! I was like unplugged from life. Like a power cord accidentally pulled out…
I don't remember anything up to a week before it happened. but according to the police who viewed CCTV footage, I crossed a junction without checking for oncoming traffic, when I should have stopped to let a car go by. I was struck by it. I was apparently the one at fault, I’m the one who should have stopped. But I wasn't allowed to watch the footage “to avoid being shocked”.
I suffered a head injury, a few fractures, lost consciousness and remained in a coma for over three weeks. The medical staff couldn’t tell if I was going to make it. During three weeks, I was shut off, like disconnected from life. No dreams, no memories, no feelings... Total emptiness. Like a switched-off television, nothing was happening. Until I eventually woke up, feeling like I just had a 30-minute nap. But it was a 3 weeks nap… I was close to never wake up again.
The hardest thing to explain or describe about this is the feeling of emptiness, and the lack of self-awareness during this period. Something you only realize once you regain consciousness, if you're lucky enough for that to happen. I know that if I had died, I wouldn't even have been aware of it, wich is very strange. One second you’re here, the next one you’re gone, whithout even knowing it. I even made a slip of the tongue on several occasions when I wanted to talk about this coma period, by saying “when I was dead”... Which says a lot about how I experienced it.
When I went to collect the remains of the bike, the front and rear parts were only held together by a brake line…
After waking up, the medical staff told me multiple times that I was lucky, and that without a helmet, I would have been dead.
POST-CRASH THOUGHTS.
When I started to understand the situation, I first assumed that the accident happened with my Parallax, because I used to ride it brakeless, and I remembered that. Also, in my mind, the Parallax was my only bike, I didn’t remember the few others.
I was very surprised to learn that it happened with the Salsa… My only “normal” bike, the only one with real brakes… I was even more surprised to learn that I was apparently the one at fault. Being the helpless victim of an accident is one thing, but being the one responsible for it is quite another. But in the end, I think it's for the best. I can't blame anyone but myself. If someone else had caused this accident, I'd probably be a lot more upset about it.
Crossing a junction without paying attention is so absurd, and so far from my riding style, that I even thought for a moment that it might have been a suicide attempt, as the police officers asked me when they came to see me. I had a lot of time to think about it, and it certainly wasn't one. To know if I was clear-headed enough to answer a few questions, they asked me if I could say what year it was, and if I was able to tell them my age. I said 2030 and 25. Close enough, the correct answer was 2023 and 33.
Luckily, I somehow wasn’t as badly damaged as the bike was. I’m still in one piece, and although I’ve partially lost the use of an eye, and have a few problems here and there, I can still walk, think and talk. I could be sitting in a wheelchair, or laying in a wooden box… It could have been worse.
When I woke up, I really felt like I was born a second time. I was lying in bed, unable to speak or understand where I was. I even had to learn to walk again, which took several weeks, something that isn't supposed to happen twice in a lifetime...
FAQ:
Date: October 10 2023.
Where: In the middle of Paris.
Right after the crash: I lost consciousness, suffered a severe head trauma, broke a few bones, and stayed in a coma for over three weeks. I had tubes everywhere, to feed me, to help me breathing, and even some going through my skull into my brain, to help reducing pressure...
The driver: I've been told that the driver of the car stopped after the accident, and has been taken into custody until the authorities gave their verdict. I've never been in contact with him.
Consequences: It took me several months to be able to return home and live on my own again. I still had a lot of difficulty speaking properly due to neurological disorders, some balance problems, and my right eye is now partially unusable.
Insurance: Fortunately, I live in France, where the Badinter Law provides a very protective scheme for cyclists and pedestrians involved in an accident with a motorized vehicle. Meaning that my bike an all my medical needs will be covered, even if I was the one at fault.
Here are a few updates on the months following the accident, during which I went to rehab hospital several times a week, from the day I was discharged from full hospitalization (in January 2024) to the end of the weekly rehab hospitalization (in November 2024).
JANUARY - NEW BIKE DAY.
After staying in hospital 24/7 between October and January, I was finally allowed to return to my parents' home for nights and weekends, in January. My first bike ride of 2024 had to be on a rehab bike. I never thought I’d say or have to do such a thing at any point in my life... But here we are.
JANUARY - FINALLY, I CAN SEE.
Since the accident happened, I have been seeing double. This is caused by a “third cranial nerve” (oculomotor nerve) palsy, in other words, my right eye is not following the other eye’s movements, creating a double vision. The good thing it that I still have monocular peripheral vision with that eye, so my field of view is still quite good. On top of that, my pupil no longer reacts to light and remains permanently fully dilated. So, to avoid seeing everything double, I had to mask my right eye, which is VERY helpful.
If you want more details about this problem, here are three diagrams I've made explaining it, and why the mask is actually very helpful.
FEBRUARY - BACK ON REAL BIKES.
After staying in hospital 24/7 between October and January, I was finally allowed to return to my parents' home for nights and weekends. As I was still having a lot of trouble walking, I wondered if I could still use real bikes. It actually worked out better than expected, because on bikes you don't have to adjust your balance as you do for each step. Once the bike is moving forward, there's nothing to adjust.
I started out with an old mountain bike that someone had given to my father, but I soon went back to the bike I had as a teenager, which suited me better. Riding for 30km felt like 250.
APRIL - “UPGRADES”.
After finally getting back home 6 months after the accident, to live on my own again, I had to adjust a few things on my track bikes, as they were the only ones I had left. I had to switch to a much smaller ratio, and I had to add brakes, because my legs
MAY - SELF DELIVERY.
I went to pick up the remains of my destroyed Salsa, so I could eventually salvage some parts… At least it wasn’t too hard to carry and bring back home.
JUNE - SHOOTING AGAIN.
Back to photography, to cover two events: Charclocross & Stolen Crit (click on these names to view the full galleries).
The only difference is that it's harder to move around (you have to do it a lot to get the photos you want), and I can no longer use my eye to check framing or focus in the viewfinder. But apart from that, I think I'm doing fine.
JUNE - ATRACKTION III
Back on top of Mont Ventoux with my Parallax again, for the third year in a row, by taking part in the event Atracktion, where the goal is to climb (and go down) the Mont Ventoux on a track bike. It was way harder the two previous times (even with a super tiny ratio, look at it!), but I didn’t want to miss this fixed gear event that has been happening for the third time, because of a stupid accident, and it was great so see people and friends! Check more pictures I took here. The whole loop was exactly 100km, and it was the first time I had ridden that much since the accident, so it was an important stage for that reason too.
JUNE - LEAVE ME ALONE!
I have been riding my bikes at least once a week for the past three months, since I’m back home. BUT, I somehow managed to get hit by a car again… I had the right of way, the green light, riding in broad daylight, on the bike lane… But there was nothing I could do to avoid this, apart from staying at home.
The driver simply didn’t look in my direction before moving, right when I was passing in front of the car. I ended on its hood, as the marks show. I only had a few bruises, and the bike remained intact, but still… Oh, and I was now using this bike with a front brake, but it didn't matter, brakes are pretty useless when a car is coming straight at you and is the one that should be braking.
JUNE - HERE WE GO AGAIN…
Less than week after the previous incident, someone cut me off again...
But this time, the driver definitely saw me, and I knew that he had. But as usual, the driver must have been like, “it's just a bike, he will brake, I'm a car, I'm the king here, this is MY ROAD” (I'm writing what an angry driver told me a few years ago, so I know their way of thinking)… He saw me coming, but he went ahead anyway, and it was too late for me to brake.
He then tried to reverse the situation, saying that it was my fault, and that I ran the red light. Which was absolutely false, and he knew it, but he tried anyway... Which was even more disgusting than the accident itself… Absolutely no respect, from start to finish.
Then he carried on peacefully, as they always do, since there are no penalties for this sort of things…
AUGUST - STRANGE PREDICTION?
While searching for old photos, I found a few of me in 2016, where I attended a halloween party dressed as an injured cyclist who had been hit by a car. I was SURE at the time that it would happen to me one day if I kept riding bikes that much, and I was very uninspired that day, so I went for an “easy option”, something that was likely to happen. I had even drawn car tire marks on my face (not very visible in the photos, but I was sure a car would be involved), and managed to take a “funny” photo with a “twisted eye”.
Everything turned out to be true a few years later, even for the eye, which is now very close to this (and why it is now partially unusable and have to mask it…).
OCTOBER - YEAR 1 - NEW BIKE DAY.
A full year has passed since the accident.
It happened on October 10, 2023, and a year later to the day, on October 10, 2024, I finally started building the new bike that will replace the destroyed one. A Salsa Warbird, basically the same as the previous one, but glossy instead of matte.
It's a strange feeling to wait all this time, list so many components, and put so much work into building a new bike, only for it to be exactly the same as before... As if nothing had happened. It feels like a lot of unnecessary work…
Health-wise, I'm recovering quite well. My right eye is still twisted, my legs are still weak, I still have minor balance issues when walking, and I still have a lot of trouble talking, but apart from that, I’m doing fine.
OCTOBER - YEAR 1 - PART 2.
Here it is! I finally finished building my new Salsa Warbird. Click here to see more pictures of it. I brought it home on October 22, 2024, so more than a year after the first one was destroyed.
Before leaving the shop where it was built, I jokingly told Clément Random (who did most of the work) that this time, I hoped to keep it in one piece for over a year, unlike the first one.
And of course… a cab driver managed to hit me on my very first trip with the bike, to bring it home… I was simply waiting at a red light, standing still for over a minute, when I heard a car coming to stop behind me, except it didn't stop...
This is the third time I've been hit by a car in 2024, and where I was absolutely not at fault... And I'm not even talking about “the big crash” from 2023, which is why I needed a new bike in the first place, or all the close calls that I managed to avoid… This time, I wasn't even moving, but I still got hit...
I had even installed two blinking lights at the front and at the rear of the bike, to be more visible. But it's useless if you don't look ahead in the first place. Fortunately, the bike and I were fine, it was more like a very rough bump than a real accident, but still... It's getting depressing... The driver admitted his mistake and told me that he was at the end of his shift, that he was tired, and that he had a long day… Well, excuse me, I had a long year!
As always, he carried on peacefully and probably slept very well, knowing that he can continue to be inattentive tomorrow without consequences.
Before leaving the place where the bike was built, I jokingly told Clément (who helped me a lot on the process) that I hoped to keep it one in one piece for more than a year this time. But I’m not sure it’s a joke anymore...
PS: After being involved in these three new accidents over the course of the year, in which I was in no way responsible and did nothing wrong, the first two being very similar to what I was told about the “big one” from 2023, I find it harder and harder to believe what I was told about it…
I hope one day to be able to view these CCTV images, which have apparently been saved, but which I still haven't been allowed to watch several months later. If I'm stupid enough to cross an intersection without paying attention, I'd like to have proof.
Now you see why I made this “strange prediction” in 2016, for that Halloween party? In the space of a year, I was involved in four accidents in total, all of them involving cars, including the one that almost got me killed. The prediction turned out to be true…
NOVEMBER - CYCLING SEEMS NICE!
Me, at the rehab hospital, checking the wikipedia page for “cycling”. I feel like my experience is slightly different.
NOVEMBER - HOSPITAL IS OVER.
Today, November 8 2024, was my last day at the rehab hospital, where I've been going several times a week since the accident. I'm not fully healed yet, and probably never will be, but at least the hospital routine is over. From now on, I'll have to continue with independent doctors, but on a less intensive basis.
I will probably continue to update this page later, hopefully less and less regularly.
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